Brooklyn.Īnd we're not saying Los Angeles is even that cool. Taking pictures of celebrities riding the subway. Entire blocks owned by Russian oligarchs. It was just a harmless anarchist with some paint.Īnd you know what else is uncool? A packed city full of empty luxury towers. And if you're thinking well maybe Bratton's a cool cop, no-a few months ago he made a big deal of locking up an anarchist for throwing fake blood on him during a protest. You have to be an actual cop or Lindsay Lohan to be uncool enough to leave LA for New York at this point. Who's moved the other way lately, from Los Angeles to New York? NYPD Commissioner Bill Bratton, for one. Would Beyoncé ever go out with her cat on her arm? No. Now that he and his wife Beyoncé and their insanely cool daughter Blue Ivy have moved to Los Angeles, who is left to rep New York City in verse and otherwise? Literally no one except Taylor Swift, and even Taylor Swift knows she's not cool, that's why she tries so hard.
"Yeah I'm out that Brooklyn, now I'm down in Tribeca, right next to DeNiro, but I'll be 'hood forever," Jay-Z once rapped about New York.
What happened is that New York isn't cool anymore and Los Angeles is still pretty cool. Beyoncé and Jay-Z are moving to Los Angeles, and while the gravitational pull of their enormous reserves of cool definitely could singlehandedly throw the entire cool balance of the US out of whack, that's not what happened here. Oh man, this is such a bummer for anyone cool left in New York City: New York City isn't cool anymore.
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